toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
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