I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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