What did we do last night that was yellow?
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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