All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
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