David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
