I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
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He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
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He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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