I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
