loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Randomize
