just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
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