Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
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Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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