Just mADE A PArabola og urine
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
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