Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
