In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
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And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
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