6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
