I'm drive I can fine osifer
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
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