I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
