lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
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