Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
In America we eat man semen.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize
