Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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