Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize