I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
