your thong is hanging out like whoa
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
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