The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
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