K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.