rhymes with "ouble enetration"
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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