I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
