Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
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