If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
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