dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
i've created a new STD.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
