Christians are straight up FREAKS
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
are you so shy because you have an std?
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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