Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
