either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
