i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize