how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Randomize