What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
