apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
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