rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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