We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
