I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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