Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
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