I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
