sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
