but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Randomize