i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
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