Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
