Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Randomize
