Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
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