Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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