i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!