so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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