from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
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